Observations of an Invisible Woman

Archive for the tag “Black men”

Dr. Afrika on Melanin Parts 3 and 4

Here is the continuation of my series on melanin, the element of life. Please watch these educational videos while I catch up on my homework.

Is Gay the New Black?




My brother called me the other day and asked me a question. “Why are gays now in alliance with the black struggle? Do you think it’s one and the same? And…if they were NOT gay, would they be so empathetic towards equality?”

WOW! What a question!

So….let me ask all of you. Is the gay struggle akin to the black experience in AmeriKlan? If so, why? If you oppose, why not?

****Since this will be touchy and the comments will probably get brutal, again, all I ask for is a modicum of reverence for gays and lesbians****

Black Vs Black…Female Against Male Part 1.

*deep breath*

(The comments will be a bloody nightmare but let’s just do this.)

Truth, I’m done with black men.” That was the statement uttered with certainty and utmost calm by my black co-worker. She, like myself, is an educated professional woman in medicine. She is a Chief Echocardiographer, no easy feat for a black woman; Ultra schooled, upper-middle class, owns her own home outright, confident and so damn attractive, you can’t help but stare at her, she’s quite a sight.

“Why?” I wanted to chuckle but seriousness of her tone told me to keep quiet. “What did they do?”

Are you freakin’ kidding me? Look at them! No job. No ambition. Still living at home. And let’s be honest. Finding a black man on my level is going to be next to impossible. ”

I nodded slowly not knowing how to respond. What should I say? X, you’re being ridiculous? Black men have it twice as hard as we do so cut the brothers some slack? You’re a snob and your job and title has gone to your head? Black men with an education and position do exist because I’ve met them. Shut up now…you’re making all black women look bad?

“Besides”, she continued “Most educated black men have white women as girlfriends and wives.”

*deep sigh*


Here we go…

The dynamic between black man and black woman has been rooted in passionate love, domestic violence, self-realization, self-hate, fatherlessness, the euphoria of education and success, drug abuse, the Civil Rights Movement, moving into the status of “middle class” from the ghettoes, abandonment, childbirth/ child rearing, a white Jesus, the MEDIA and the black church ever since we came here from that little boat ride. That’s a lot to deal with! When all was said and done, we did the absolute unthinkable; we turned on each other.

Black men, propagandazied as monkeys, criminals, worthless, animals, unkempt and unfaithful, began to fall victim to the worst slavery of all…mental slavery. This is not an excuse for bad behaviour, but a study in why certain behaviours occur within our community.

In the recent decades, black women have risen in different areas of  education. Today, black women are in fields that were traditionally made for white males. Since I do not believe anything written about us by whites, I will not quote statistics on college education and employment by gender. Not only does the black woman make the bread and butter but she is the matriach of her family. She tends to the kids homework, attends PTA meetings, cooks, does laundry and sexually services her man. Without her, the family unit suffers.

The black man, on the other hand, scrutinized and made to be “suspicious”, is often denied work no matter how qualified. Stereotyped as lazy and driven out of the workforce under the clever guise of a lay-off, he is under immense pressure. Implosion comes, unfortunately, when he finds no release for his angst, depression and anger.

Remember this?

This broke my heart. And made me weep when I heard sisters use this as an excuse to give up on our men.

This is my supposition as to why:

1. Black men are too damaged and not worth “fixing.”

2. They’re broke.

3. White men will wine and dine; black men are clueless when it comes to romance. For them is all about sex.

4. Her education/position/status brainwashes her into believing he’s not good enough for her.

5. She wants to elevate herself into middle / upper class status and a black man “won’t do it for her.”

6. He wants her to take care of him.

7. He’s abusive.

8. Other black men have failed her consistently and she’s not willing to try again.

9. She’s a golddigger and the fastest way to get to the top is with a white man at her side.

10. She’s happy with work, friends, God, hobbies  and family and doesn’t need / want / care to be bothered.

Any thoughts? Do you agree/disagree? Why?

Finish This Sentence #3

“If I could marry a celebrity, I’d marry…”

I’ll go first. I’d marry Idris Elba. Yummy!


*fans self*

If Idris is busy, I’ll take him:

But…I’ll probaby have an illicit, sleazy, dirty affair with him:

And him…(on weekends when my husband is out of town and the kids are at grandma’s):

ok…I’ll stop now…

your turn…

Dreadlocked Man

He beckons me with his flesh, his voice, his sensuality

He taunts me with words that burn me alive, leaving me breathless…my brain ravaged

He tortures me with his poetry, gut-wrenching and soulful, taking me to dizzying heights of sadness and deep contemplation

He pains me with his torture…making it my own

I think him, see him, feel him, taste him, touch him, smell him, breathe him

I want more…gorging myself on his essence

His manliness fulfills me

His confidence thrills me

His raw sensuality excites me like no other

His skin a smooth velvet casing born of God’s divine wish

His hair a reminder of our people…proud and fierce

He is my mysterious dreadlocked man

Top Ten Beautiful Black Men






Idris Elba

Chiwetel Ejiofor

Isaach de Bankole

Dennis Haysbert

Bob Marley

Lenny Kravitz

Malik Yoba

Morris Chestnut

Blair Underwood

Taye Diggs

Honourable Mentions:

Omar Epps

Shemar Moore

Michael Ealy

Marcus Samuelsson


Any others you’d like to add?

The Fear: A Continuation to “The Plan”





****This post is dedicated to my African man. When God created me from your rib, you became the other half of my spiritual self. Therefore, my existence depends on your survival****

Black men in AmeriKlan, let me reveal “The Fear.”

The fear begins with the notion that you won’t succumb to “The Plan.” That you’ll defy all odds and become educated, well-spoken, dignified, confident and take AmeriKlan away from them. With proper encouragement, a good foundation of love from your friends and family and a college degree, you’ll be gaining on them. Having an education DOES NOT guarantee you success, but it will open doors for you, something white racist AmeriKlans fear the most.

Look at this guy called Barack. He’s educated, well-spoken, smart and driven. And you must agree, he’s got a nice little job, right? But let’s get back to The Fear…After going against “The Plan”, you’ll want more money with your new education. Then that corner office. After a few years, maybe your own business. Then you’ll be able to employ them to work for you. So you’ll be in charge, have the control, make the rules…See where I’m going with this? White supremacy is the antithesis of black enlightenment. If you, a black man, have a nice house, that’s one LESS nice house for them. If you, a black man, make more money, that’s one LESS dollar for them. And so it goes.

But, The Fear doesn’t stop there. There’s also the women. Since white supremacy states that white women are prized, valued and prettier than ALL other women, when you, a black man, have all the amenities only a white man should have, naturally the white woman will be yours for the taking. But what about the black woman? If you are supreme, then she becomes prized, beautiful and valued. See how it works? Ever wonder why, no matter how hard you give at your job, you just can’t get a fair shake? Ever wonder why a white man with a prison record is more likely to acquire and maintain a job than a qualified, educated black man WITH NO PRISON RECORD??? It is being done on purpose. All apart of The Fear.

On the job, you’ll be harshly criticized, swiftly punished with no means of redemption, watched like a hawk, discredited, ignored, mocked, have rumors and lies spread about you,(please, for the love of GOD, don’t be alone with a white woman for any reason unless you have a chaperone…this is especially true for doctors, construction workers, realtors/home inspectors and teachers) and made to feel dumb, slow and incompetent. This will spill over into your personal life as well. You’ll be angry, depressed, homicidal, likely to abuse drugs and alcohol, hit your woman, beat your children, overspend as a way of compensating, which I might add, leads to a lowered credit rating and has the ability to affect home and car purchases…All apart of The Fear.

And when you’ve had enough, you’ll save up money and build your own damn company in your basement or garage. You’ll struggle to eat and pay rent. You’ll fight the banks for a loan and humbly accept any amount they give you just to have a little slice of the pie. Then, somehow, someone will throw a monkey wrench in your life to try to take away everything you’ve sweated for, begged God for and had many sleepless nights wondering what will become of your life.

If you give up now, you’ll succumb to The Fear.


Stay tuned for the final installment of The Trilogy….

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