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diaryofanegress

Observations of an Invisible Woman

The War Between Black Men and Black Women: A Simple Study in Zio-Feministic Psy-Op

tumblr m62bwpSi291qdlh1io1 250 Men Are JUST Giving Women Head? Why? And Since When?!

A black reader responded to my “21 harsh truths” post. With over 3,000 reposts on Facebook, this post is hitting a raw nerve with everyone. Here’s what he had to say. Pay special attention to the parts I “bolded”:

“Black men who hate black women hate themselves,” not 100% true… those that do hate Black women it is because black women expect too much from their black men, and when their black husbands or boyfriends can not deliver they(black women) start the whole black male bashing thing. (common in a lot of Black movies) Black women are arrogant and think they are heaven on earth. Black women are angry and bitter and are always comparing themselves to other women whether they admit it or not. Black women think that their hair and nails make them the elite of society. The black men that do hate black women hate them because they cannot control them. While your statement may carry some validity it was only part of the whole picture.

“Black women who hate black men have no self-respect,” again not 100% true… those that do hate black men because the want that big house and fancy car and become bitter and upset when he can not deliver or live up to her expectations. They hate black men because a black man(almost any man especially black men) will look at another woman or any race and comment or high five while she (black woman) has to get just about naked or be an easy lay just so she can get noticed. The black women that do hate black men hate them because they cannot control them. Again while your statement may carry some validity it was only part of the whole picture.

Do not misunderstand I agree with a large percentage of what you posted, but what I also saw in a lot of generalization. There is a huge difference between a Black person and a “Nigger.” Your post fails to show that… while yes White America may see us all as “no-good, low-down, dirty Nigger,” it is up to us to know the difference and teach that to our children as the schools and society isn’t going to do it. Then and only then will we reach and full obtain what our ancestors fought and died for

****************************************************************************************************** Since the “war” on the black family structure isn’t going away, perhaps it’s time to tackle this monster head on. Some of the things I will mention here will no doubt offend but since this topic is always coming up in one way or another, I feel it’s due time to air out the dirty laundry. Researching Zionism has given me great insight to its offspring: Feminism, Racism, Pedophilia, TransHuemanism, Transsexualism and Colourism. Of course all are ideologies of the white supremacist system.

What is my definition of white supremacy?

It is a system that functions universally that aims to destroy the Original Hueman in the three aspects of life:

Spiritually

Mentally

Physically

Some may ask, “Aren’t you oversimplifying things?” No. In my estimation, if you do not have the Spirit, the mind and the body, nothing else can be manifested. Breaking the African “Ba” (soul) begins and ends with the African Woman. All life stems from her. Therefore, she is the main focus in the equation. I do not need to go into vast detail about what has been done to the black woman by both white AND black men. Books, movies (the Colour Purple), art, articles and TV series have covered that ad nauseum.

What I’m going to say are 2 simple and truthful, yet hurtful facts:

1. Black women are angry at black men. Are we justified in that anger? Yes. Is it entirely his doing? No.

2. Black men are angry at black women. Are they justified in that anger? Yes. Is it entirely our doing? No.

In order to break up the black family structure, black women were sought, beaten down and targeted for mental and physical elimination. Hitler wrote his entire manifesto based on his struggles and desires to cleanse the earth of lesser life forms. Throughout 500 years, Zionistic propaganda brainwashed the black woman, through white feminism and white misogyny, to believe that the black man is “her enemy” and her “career”, the one that white supremacy ALLOWS her to have,  is more important than family. She is brainwashed to believe that her sexuality is “up for grabs by the highest bidder” instead of it being an expression of God.

For the black man, he was and still is made to feel, over the course of 500 years, emasculated by the powerlessness he feels by NOT being ALLOWED to protect and provide for his black family unit. Therefore, the black woman’s intentional  and permitted success and education would ultimately tear the black man and black woman apart. Black men need to be and feel in control of their family, their life and their future. By denying him that right, yes…I said right, he turns to other ways, legal and illegal, to feel masculinized. What are those other ways? Selling drugs, joining gangs, which is his way of having a structural family unit, sexing and marrying out of his race, abusing and using women for his carnal pleasures (rape culture), black on black crime and other lower vibrational acts.

The black woman, who is rightfully the head of her home and children, needs to feel safe, valued and protected in all areas of her life. By denying her that safety and value, she seeks attention in the form of excessive shopping, permitted and planned career advancement, material worship, sexing and marrying outside of her race and feeling the need to reduce herself as a sexual plaything to “keep a man.” The traps have been set for us since we we’re kidnapped and brought here as commodity.

Tel-lie-vision has depicted the new “norm” of a modern-day family. That family is usually white, broken, homosexual, beastial, carnal and spiritually diseased. Since we, Africans, are mentally ill from centuries of mitochondrial DNA-induced trauma, we now equate the filth attached with the Eurocentric behavioural patterns with our own. No longer are we proud to be “God-fearing” and “modest”. We display Eurocentric misogyny freely and equate that with masculinity.

With more and more black men intentionally incarcerated (The Patriot Act) during their reproductive years, the black female is left to raise her children by herself and leave them in the hands of The State. Thusly, the cycle continues. Feminism (Zionism) has given the black woman a false sense of accomplishment and the black man a sense of low self-esteem. Since we are unable to identify the culprit of our demise, we act in the exact fashion that we were staged to behave. With utter disdain, disrespect, contempt, hatred, animosity and ill-will towards each other…which is nothing but a projection of how we feel about ourselves!

May I admit a secret?

There’s not one day that goes by that I don’t have to fight myself on this matter.  The evil is all around us. It permeates the air. I must fight myself not to go down that wide road of hating my own people. Which, as you know, is really self-hatred. My way of fighting, as best as I can, is pretty simple. It consists of 5 things which I try to practice daily:

1. Help those that ask for help…within reason.

2. Show kindness when it is due.

3. Remember that you, conscious black man/ black woman, were once asleep too. Try to have a bit of patience with those that are struggling. 

4. Accept that everyone will not make it…including members of your own family.

5. Stop identifying with the Eurocentric culture which is, by design, destructive to the African. Learn who you are and the healing with eventually begin.

Is there anything you wish to add to this article? Any thoughts?

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60 thoughts on “The War Between Black Men and Black Women: A Simple Study in Zio-Feministic Psy-Op

  1. 1. Help those that ask for help…within reason.

    Yes, you cannot afford to burn yourself out otherwise you will be of no help to anyone.

    2. Show kindness when it is due.

    This should be in one’s nature. White supremacy seems to have put a damper on this in varying degrees, what with the divide and conquer.

    3. Remember that you, conscious black man/ black woman, were once asleep too. Try to have a bit of patience with those that are struggling.

    It is a form of self-hatred not to empathize and take pity on others who may still be unawake.

    4. Accept that everyone will not make it…including members of your own family.

    This is a given as many are fearful or are just plain brainwashed. You have control over yourself but not others. You must realize early on that you can only talk and hope some come to an understanding. Be prepared to be met with ridicule, incredulity and indignation. They will take what you have to say or leave it.

    5. Stop identifying with the Eurocentric culture which is, by design, destructive to the African. Learn who you are and the healing with eventually begin.

    I have iterated continuously, learning your historical lineage and family background; the history of your people, etc. I am the descendant of escaped slaves for example, something which I am inordinately proud of. Revel in your ancestry.

    Is there anything you wish to add to this article? Any thoughts?

    Realize that humour is a fantastic balm for one’s soul! Folks, you are dealing with absurdities! Whites are an absurdity for the most part. Don’t debate them, mock them! It shows hopefully, not anger or vitriol, but indifference to them. Their fragile egos depends upon your anger and denigration at their antics.

    Emphasize with your brethren regardless of their situation. Empathy is one of the foremost emotions one can possess. You may disagree with what others do or say, but try to understand where they are coming from.

    Lastly, fight the power as best you can! I haven’t posted here or anywhere else as much as I would like to, as I have an ongoing complaint which is entering the home stretch. Most of my off time is taken up with it. But I look at the positives; the knowledge I have acquired, which has been invaluable. Good can come out of bad. But realize that this is something these arseholes will be paying for, the taking up of my time to pursue this, and discrimination.

    Keep up the good work Negress!

  2. Ms. J on said:

    I’m so glad you wrote this piece.
    I notice that when our people spend endless time warring about what the opposite gender does to us, we get nowhere close to ending this “gender war”.
    But when Black men and women of both genders identify the root cause as RWS, our conversations are much more constructive and insightful.

    I do believe that there are many problems between Black men and women that need to be addressed and stopped immediately, but attacking each other won’t work. We must agree that our problems were caused by external forces and people and agree on how to treat and NOT treat each other.
    But she shouldn’t attempt to be gender neutral either. A lot of Whites are promoting this idea, which I see as crazy, but we have to get back to seeing each other as equally valuable unlike this anti-human culture we live in.

    Perhaps we should even attempt to conduct ourselves differently in “romantic relationships”. Maybe we need to treat them as contracts, military partnerships, etc. I see zero evidence that the “falling in love” idea has helped Blacks build stronger relationships and families. What’s love? People love someone at one minute and hate them the next minute. The White divorce rate proves that!

    The “Gender War” is a distraction from the biggest war among people, which is RWS. All wars come from it, and all wars won’t end until RWS is stopped.
    (sorry for the long post)

  3. great post. i would add don’t throw other black ppl under the bus or judge based on appearances. don’t argue or cosign with racists and don’t insult another black person.

    “The black men that do hate black women hate them because they cannot control them” This is the truth, i see too many comments from black men telling black women to know our place and get back. I don’t agree with that because if black women did get back then we wouldn’t have had women like harriet tubman, rosa parks, and bessie coleman. I do think black men are to be protectors and providers but u don’t have to tell black women to move for u to do that. Black women and black men built this country, and now u want us to know our place? when black women had to work the fields along side black men while they were pregnant or just after delivery we weren’t told to get back we were told to work. SO now that we have done those things now we are supposed to get back?

    The other thing i can’t stand is how some of them blame everything on black women. example: george zimmerman gets off, omg its that black woman rachel jeantel’s fault, not the precious white female jury who decides this a holes sentence.

    “upset when he can not deliver or live up to her expectations”
    this is also true for some black women, they choose a man they think they can fix and expect him to be an amazing boyfriend or husband. when he don’t change to what they want they ignore him, which is what they should’ve did in the first place.

    “They hate black men because a black man(almost any man especially black men) will look at another woman or any race and comment or high five while she (black woman) has to get just about naked or be an easy lay just so she can get noticed”

    This is kinda true, if a man acts like that then the woman shouldn’t feel she has to lower herself for him. With u is not where he wants to be, let him go where he’s trying to go, when he fall on his arse don’t give him the time of day let his other women pick him up. THis is not too much of an issue i have , i just don’t like the ones who uplift other women and put black women down, then when the other race of women disrespect them and say racist things to them , they want black women’s sympathy.

  4. mstoogood4yall on said:

    ALso truth wtf is up with that nasty ad at the top of the page. Ew those ppl are air humping in public wtf. Why is that woman all on his arse nasty

  5. Great post Negress. I am glad you wrote this.
    I for one haven’t had an issue with Black Men or Black Women mainly. I like to think that I see everyone as God’s creatures , beautiful and unique in their own way. If I have an issue its not a black and white issue at all, but “that person gots issues” type of issue. From what I see of myself I tend to get along with almost anyone I meet. I’ve always been softspoken, and to myself type of person, so I never really got into the things my other young black “friends” got involved in/with. I am a social person, I just wasn’t interested in going out to clubs or parties. If they asked my advice on something I would just say “everyone is different”. I’ve dated a couple of black men and my experience with them was mostly good. They treated me with respect and we had genuine love for each other. My negative experiences was with other races like I’ve mentioned in another posts. Just total disrespect and disregard for me as a woman , with a soul and feelings. I am now seeing this as a reflection of the hatred on themselves or even jealousy, perhaps serious mental issues.
    I am at the point now, where I am healing from within, and looking to find the truth as to whatever that may be. I feel deceived from the world and from church’s that I grew up in or even attended recently I dislike very much ORGANIZED RELIGION. My family was part of the Hebrew Israelite “religion” and it was tough, personally for me. Only because although I am to myself, I like to feel that my opinion counts towards something, not just to cook and clean and that even though I am a woman, I do have a say in my spirituality and my connection with Jah. My husband has always respected me no matter what, we just realized the path that our spirituality was heading and decided to take a break and find out the truth on our own, which has worked great through deep meditation and breaking out of the “cycle” so to speak.

    4. Accept that everyone will not make it…including members of your own family

    This is a challenge to accept as I have some family members who don’t have an open mind, but I visualize in time that this will change. If not, then I have to do what’s right for myself. I miss them, but I no longer concern myself with the problem. I have black family members who absolutely hate other blacks and think they are better than blacks. They’re not light skinned either, they just don’t like black people, they wont’ support black owned business’s or anything. It’s almost like the whole “uncle ruckus” syndrome. Which I personally don’t get, because we all were raised in a loving black family(for the most part) so not sure where the self hate came from , and I know my ancestors are not happy for their actions.

    I feel fortunate that I don’t feel hatred towards other blacks. I love my family.
    I don’t have anything to add to this post other than lets love each other and stop the hate. I think women and men equally have their part and role to play when it comes to family roles and such. I feel its basic.
    A family consist of a loving environment where there is respect on equal sides. A man and woman, united to love each other, love Jah, do great things, raise their children and live in peace. While that can be a challenge in this crazy world, remember who is in control and Love and respect one another and you will be in tune with the universe. Jah will see that what you need and desire is fulfilled. Don’t let others tell you how to live your life, and don’t be so eager to share deep personal details with people you hardly know. Tune away from the television and stop watching all the crap that shows our family in a negative light. Watch the shows that show us in positive loving relationships.. doing positive things, being successful.

    I read somewhere that the TV is a portal in which the beast uses to their advantage against us. Be careful what you let into your minds and hearts and if you don’t feel you can deal with it, get stronger and come back to it at a later time when you’re stronger and able to deal. I got that tidbit from Sis Yaffa Bey as well.
    For instance, I’ve read a couple of people post about an “abagonds blog” but there’s whites there that say hateful things. I internalize a lot of what I read and hear and I feel deeply. I can’t deal with attacks and hatred speech so until my spirituality is stronger, maybe Ill check it out, but for now, I feel I’ll only get angry and distract myself from what the ultimate goal is. Maybe I am wrong, but its what works for me.
    Peace Fam.

  6. LOL I noticed that too. I thought it was part of the post.. “things Europeans do in public”

  7. What was your first step in looking up your historical lineage? Where did you start(website, places of records etc?) I ask because I am interested in this as well. Although my grandparents are “black” They never said they came from Africa…. makes me wonder where they truly came from.

  8. Mstoogood and alia

    The GIF is white Feminism (Zionism) in action.

  9. There’s good black men/women out there who don’t feel this way. My only advice is, that if they can’t see how good a black woman/man is, don’t waste your time or get offended. The Man or woman obviously has self hatred issues that they need to work through. Carry your head high as you have been and just keep it moving to others who will respect you and not berate you. Easier said than done, I know, there are some good melinated fam out there who would love to have a relationship within the “melinated” peoples. If they come to you after being hurt… express your true feelings on the issue. They don’t feel the same, keep it moving. FOR INSTANCE.. I have some melinated male friends who are always talking about how exotic type women are better, everyones entitled to their “preference” but I let them know they need to get back to black and get them a melinated queen, they laugh it off, until I point out that their Asian and Hispanic ex -wives, are just that.. ex wives/baby mama’s… so something’s up… IJS.. If “they” were so much better, they would be in united , loving families, raising their kids “together”.

  10. great post.. what is “marriage” exactly and who drew up the rules for it. Romans, Europeans? Who are you “signing” your life over to when you sign marriage certificate. The traditional weddings, are those a ceremony honoring something other than what we have come to think? So many questions..
    If you care and respect someone and they are your partner then so be it. Is it wrong to think that because you are married that you own the other person. Maybe.. just maybe.. we choose each other as partners, mates, and we build a family together and we are a family unit in this lifetime. Because you are my mate doesn’t mean I OWN you. Granted , you don’t want your significant other sticking and laying down with others but if he has great conversation with another female is that wrong? or vice versa.?
    I am not advocating open marriages. I am simply saying that when people feel they OWN each other, maybe its to much pressure. When you love and respect your partner, and connect with them on sexual level, than that’s your partner , to have children with and be a family. Maybe that’s why marriages fail… Because they feel they own each other, when in fact, the universe is the only thing that truly owns us?
    Thoughts? I am learning myself, just wanted viewpoints. I feel that maybe that’s the way it should be, but because of the powers that be, some have lost their self control, to be able to just be friendly with the opposite sex over a period of time. Maybe its something Tel Lie Vision has displayed and influenced over time.

  11. blackgirlinberlin on said:

    I have to admit I had some anger issues with Black men. This is how I ended up in Germany.. my attempt at trying something new. My ex fiance was black and was sociopath who I later found was sleeping with men on the side. Instead of taking time to heal I thought by dating out I could have less issues like this, but this lead me to waking up. Living in Germany of all places has made me really want to learn and grow as a black woman. Now, I do not hate black men, but try to understand their struggle and mine are the same. Since I am stuck in Germany until I can save and get out I realize how much I miss black men. Although, I was lucky to find I think the only conscious black male in Berlin that exclusively dates black women…. I am still stuck a situation, in a country I have a love-hate relationship with, but at least I have a brother who understands and helps me to cope. I think many black women are angry at black men… but many do not understand why or even try again..they simply run to white or other men who sometimes treat them worse. There are many unhappy people I meet here (black) that are in relationships with whites and still sleep and socialize with each other in secret.. or not so secret. It is a shame, but I hope more will wake up soon.

  12. THE ALCHEMIST on said:

    This article is very sad. DOAN are you a Black Hebrew Israelite? This article sounds like something based off of Sharazad Ali’s book ” Black Mans Guide…”. Brainwashed, evil, materialistic black women use feminism to emasculate the black male. This article is steeped in the bad logic that black women have been agents of black male oppression. Black male investment in patriarchy will be his own undoing. I do not by into the lie that I should sacrifice myself on the altar of the “Re-emasculation of the Black Male Project” . I refuse to destroy myself in the name of the black male ego. DOAN you have ignored the rapes, beatings, violence and sex trafficking that black males have subjected back women to as a source of black female anger. I would also add the deeply held belief that ONLY black males have suffered over the past 400 years. Black men and their female enablers have given them a pass called “The Black Male Victimhood Pass”. All problems will be laid at the doorstep of the evil black women and the white man. The white woman always gets a pass.The end result is misery for black women, misery for black children, and misery for black men. As long as black males, DOAN, and Verb2013 believe that black women are conspiring to oppress black men no progress will be made. The menticidal behavior of many black males: sex trafficking black women and girls, rampant child molestation in black families, selling drugs, using drugs, nihilism, violent behavior toward BM and BW, worship of WW and other non-black women, orchestrated on-line stalking of black women, and 20 years of “b*tch hoe” rap music needs to be addressed. “The Black Male Victimhood Pass” needs to be set alight and burned to cinders. Sister DOAN please burn you copy of Dr Ali’s book; it’s messing with your beautiful loving mind.

    The Justice Departments Report on the Sex Trafficking of Black Women and Girls:
    Human Trafficking: Black Girls Are Still Enslaved

    http://www.ctaafsc.org/ama/orig/2012_Conference/PPT/pdf/Human_Trafficking_Final__2-11-12.pdf

  13. “For the black man, he was and still is made to feel, over the course of 500 years, emasculated by the powerlessness he feels by NOT being ALLOWED to protect and provide for his black family unit. Therefore, the black woman’s intentional  and permitted success and education would ultimately tear the black man and black woman apart. Black men need to be and feel in control of their family, their life and their future. By denying him that right, yes…I said right, he turns to other ways, legal and illegal, to feel masculinized. What are those other ways? Selling drugs, joining gangs, which is his way of having a structural family unit, sexing and marrying out of his race, abusing and using women for his carnal pleasures (rape culture), black on black crime and other lower vibrational acts.”
    Very well said!! This entire post is very well written and you did great research. A post like this is loooooong overdue. I hope it can produce some healing and a better understanding of the problems we face. Kudos sis! You did a great job. *hugs* 🙂

  14. Alchemist

    First, i’m not a practicing Hebrew Israelite. I don’t practice any religion. I try and subscribe to the principles Ma’at. The operative word is T-R-Y.

    Second, no passes are being made to anyone. I’m not saying in the least that black males are “forgiven” or given a “slap on the wrist” for their CONTINUED atrocities against us. Nor are black females “forgiven” for using her children as a weapon to punish her man.

    This article, which was bound to offend someone, was written as a study as to WHY we are so angry with each other and cannot seem to move forward. The answer I came up with was rooted in, SURPRISE!, White Supremacy. I’m not familiar with Dr. Ali’s work. I just wrote this from my own perspective.

    I’ve written posts in the past urging BOTH of us to stop abusing each other. Men need to stand up and do what they we’re put here to do: Protect and Guide the black family. Women need to stand up and do what they were put here to do: Protect the children and lead them into our next generation.

    The female is DEPENDENT on the male for protection. That is his purpose. Her purpose is to give life. The two are DEPENDENT on each other. When one (or both) are not permitted to act out in our God-given duties, we BOTH suffer.

    Black men sexing, raping, hitting and killing black women is a direct manifestation of 500 years of brutality on his psyche. He is now Europeanized. Black women sexing, degrading themselves, killing their children and abusing their men ( yes…women DO abuse men too) is a direct manifestation of 500 years of brutality on her psyche. She is now apart of the Feminist Regime.

    In simpler terms:

    We’re both fuck ups.

    Now that we’ve analyzed this, i’d like to quote my favourite Doctor.

    “I know who put me in the box. The question is: How am I going to get out of the box?”

  15. Don’t provide your info to any of those lineage tracking sites, they exist only to maintain databases for developing biogenetic weapons.

    On top of that you can’t expect whites to provide you with a truthful recollection of your heritage given what they’ve always done to distort and destroy our history.

    All of Africa’s cultures are worth studying and claiming as your own, pick one and roll with it.

  16. Ms. J on said:

    @ alia5012

    I agree!! And the more questions you ask yourself about this “love/marriage” business, the more you see it as a tool for our confusion.

  17. emile on said:

    6. Begin with self, meaning be more critical of yourself, your actions, your thoughts, your speech, your outlook on this particular issue as it relates to you, first, before you judge the other gender for what they are not doing to you. If you have low-grade self-esteem and self-respect for yourself, how can you possibly expect to have an effect on the opposite sex? This takes a lot practice and is not an easy thing to do, especially with the removal of the ego and brainwashing that keeps most of us captive and short of redeeming ourselves from ingrained behavior and thinking patterns. People who love and respect themselves make it obvious, no matter where they are or what they do.

    7. Stop feeding the brain-computer with damaging data, i.e. negative imagery, tel-lie-vision, movies, social media, video games, trashy so-called music, etc. This is another area of tremendous challenge for most of us, as we are in a very media-saturated society. Realistically, we have to use these mediums for various necessary purposes in life, but it is our responsibility for filtering what we read, view, listen and say to others. Practice willpower. Challenge yourself to be more constructive in what is perceived by the most powerful organ in your body (temple), analyzing, scrutinizing and thoroughly questioning all content and context, to see if it is truly beneficial and constructive in making us whole as Black women and Black men. Most of our most negative impression of Black women and Black men are purposely fabricated and disseminated by the media to render us in the most negative way possible. Deception is an art, and a lot of us are easily persuaded into thinking that whites have our best interests in mind through the illusion of creative imagery depicting Black men and Black women. You are never going to see that positive image of beautiful Black people, not unless you create it yourself, or become preoccupied with diligently searching for such. Either way, we should know by now that it is not the intent of the enemy to project you in a positive light in any way imaginable. Instead, search for media by those who are out here working hard, dropping real knowledge about our condition, the manufactured, well-engineered state of confusion, and the variety of alternatives we can use to defeat such conditions. but you’ve got to put serious effort into ending this “war” between the sexes. It’s counter-productive, gets neither gender anywhere and despoils future generations. Think of where we will be twenty years from now if conditions do not improve…

    The answers to solving the contentions between Black men and Black women have to be sought out in earnest; they are not going to jump out at us. Being intellectually lazy, dishonest with self, insincere and accusatory is not going to make this situation any better. Before I even begin to point out the discrepancies of any Black woman, I gotta begin with self, first, and have my shit together before we come together as complementary assets.

  18. emile on said:

    Also, since we are getting to the kernel of the nut in determining what problems exist between both genders, maybe there also needs to be a refinement of definition for both Black manhood and Black womanhood, to enable us to meet contemporary challenges, in the most healthiest and constructive way manageable. As we can surmise from our disappointment with the status quo, the entire concept for both genders has been infiltrated, distorted and perverted for the worst outcome of our existence. Forget the chest-thumping and fist-pumping. We need to talk about a 360-degree, top-to-bottom, left-to-right, front-to-back assessment of what’s truly going to work for our survival. It will be like shaking off old skin.

  19. seedofjapheth on said:

    I think its important to see the role of white female in the situation of black male black female relations. White females try to infiltrate movements that oppose white supremacy by pretending they have common cause with black people due to being oppressed by a white patriarchy. Whats hilarious about this is that the whole purpose of the white patriarchy was to provide white females with a life where they dont have to do any work and people of color do all their domestic chores for them. White patriarchy was in service of the white female.

    But now popular opinion in society is starting to change and people are speaking out more and more against white people and so white females are trying to avoid this backlash by saying that they had nothing to do with white supremacy and that it was all a white patriarchy. Well lets be honest. White females had no problem accepting the money of rich white males. They would compete with eachother to marry rich white males. They had no problem spending their whole day sipping tea while their domestic chores including the raising of their children was done by people of color. So lets be honest. White females benefitted the most from white patriarchy and when popular opinion viewed that situation as acceptable they liked white patriarchy because white patriarchy made them the most privileged in society.

    But now they see the tide turning and they are trying to get in good with people of color. White females have even started singing like black females in an effort to make themselves more attractive to black males. This is the reason almost every white woman tries to imitate the black singing voice. White female pretends to be like black female in order to trick black males into viewing her as an acceptable partner. The truth is though is that white females cannot sing like black females, they are only capable of imitating and that style of singing only sounds authentic when black females sing that way because you can tell its really from the heart.

    These games that white females are playing i am not saying is the cause of division between black men and black women. But it does play a role in increasing that division it seems to me. Simply put: white females see that racial opinions are changing and so they figure that they have ridden on the backs of white males long enough and they are gonna ditch white males and bash them like a discarded piece of trash and white females figure they are gonna steal black males from black females.

  20. Seed

    Why such honesty today? May I ask what prompted this?

  21. seedofjapheth on said:

    I’m just sick of hearing white feminists saying ridiculous lies about how they historically were in a similar situation to people of color. I’m not anti-feminist… I think its important for females to advocate for their rights and i think the same is important for males. But white women are just so ridiculous these days, theyve managed to convince themselves of all sorts of ridiculous things. The other thing they do is they have these sneaky ways of being aggressive to women of color and they hide their aggression behind pretending to be a “white savior” and they always try to act like they know whats best for women of color. Honestly white women need to get their head out of their behind. I’m just disgusted with the way they are acting. Theyre playing too many games and its just not cool. I guess i just wanted to vent.

  22. Ms. J on said:

    @ seedofjapeth

    WOW.

    The White female definitely does go under the radar of many Black people – even myself at times – but she is powerful.

  23. seedofjapheth on said:

    The biggest thing white females dont want people talking about is that a lot of the mobs of whites that killed black males were incited to do that by false accusations of rape by white females. These white women who have a history of inciting mobs against black males by falsely accusing them of rape are now all of the sudden the friend of people of color?

  24. Ms. J on said:

    @ seedofjapheth

    And perhaps a growing number of White females want to take Black women into their beds. If you keep on saying that all men are evil, and especially non-white males, than the alternative is to get with you, a white woman.
    But I could be wrong.

  25. seedofjapheth on said:

    I didnt know about that angle to the situation. The whole situation seems very complicated.

  26. Ms. J on said:

    @ seedofjapheth

    I wouldn’t say that all White women are like this, but there was a White female in college who would always want to hug me. Anytime she saw me, she ran to me to gave me a hug. She always wanted to touch me. I even had to stop her from telling me about her sexual escapades because it got annoying. It was honestly creepy, but avoiding her did the trick.

    I’m going to admit to you personally that if we were locked in a room by ourselves, I believe she would try to engage in sex with me. My spirit tells me that. So I take the codified position of AVOIDING her at all costs.

    Ironically, we had a conversation about racism last year, and she was saying all these negative stereotypes about black people. So I think something more insidious explains her behavior.

  27. Ms. J on said:

    @ seedofjapheth
    Case in point: http://www.bluedevilsunited.com/2010/02/interracial-lesbian-relationships-swell.html

    http://lesbianinthecitee.blogspot.com/2013/01/my-scandal-addiction-love-of.html

    “The rate of interracial sexual involvement among lesbians is even greater than it is among heterosexuals, although exact figures are hard to come by.” – http://condor.depaul.edu/mwilson/multicult/dslesb.htm

  28. seedofjapheth on said:

    White females think they can “get a pass” if they say racist things because they think they deserve more leeway due to not being white males.

  29. @ ms j
    wtf. Ok the second link i stopped reading after she said i’m more polished than the average black woman and i love scandal. smh. Sometimes i think the gay black community is more whitewashed. They go around talking bout gay is the new black,gtfoh. I think both white women and white men have high homosexual desires. Why else would white men castrate black men and rape them. Why else would white women always want to touch black women be it our hair, skin,etc. Or go to our youtube channels discussing hair and they are there talking about omg yall hair is so versatile u can do so much with it i wish i had ur hair. THey are obsessed with us. SInce they weren’t born with those features they admire the next step is to get with someone who does. Whether these ppl are gay or straight their mo is always the same. They describe black women the same way that straight white men describe black women. I like their hair, their skin,etc, hardly or never talking about the personality and the way the person acts.

  30. seedofjapheth on said:

    The third article speculates on some psychological motives by white women for pursuing black females. Do you think there is some hidden intentions by white women for doing this or do you think its just simple love?

  31. Bestpartofwakingup on said:

    I would love to have a friendship with black women and I would love if we could air out our issues with maturity for adult content. I don’t want to play blame game because what I’ve noticed is that if black women are going to accept any type of blame for their actions, they will automatically bring in the black men as well. It’s like if you get in trouble, you’ll take your whippin but then you start bringing up what your brother did cause you can’t or don’t want to be the only one getting hit.

    It’s understandable but sometimes you gotta take your own hits and bring no one else into it.

    So, truthfully, it would delight my soul to have more black female friends and I have to say, straight ones at that. The few black lesbians I’ve met all try to show me how much better at being a man they are than me, an actual man. It breeds for heated arguments and talks of men having oppressed women since the dawning of time and all that.

    I think love and romance and the best relationship stems from great friendships and this society sometimes tries to portray friendship first as the wrong section to be in with each other so the goal ends up being sex or strangers to couples immediately without the foundation of truly knowing who your partner is or if they are even the true definition of the word partner.

    Plus, I think if we(black men and women) were friends we’d have a better pool to pick from. It’s like raising organic food and everyone pitches in and everyone can eat. You have 7 black men and 7 black women who are all true friends with each other; they can choose within that group who to build with because they are all quality people and any who didn’t get chosen can be directed to another group of positive friends in hopes of building.

    So lets talk, openly and honestly and let’s not get offended at the differences of opinions or beliefs. We live our whole lives devoloping who we are; it would be highly selfish and inconsiderate to try and change someone or charge someone because they don’t see what you see how you see it.

    Also, just like DOAN said to give help when asked, I think we have to also hold people accountable(not insult) for their foul actions. Men and women alike. More encouragement and less discouragement.

  32. All:

    I enjoy and thank seed for his raw honesty in explaining the mind and motives of the Euro female but I really want this post to be about us.

    Please try to keep the thread relatively on point.

    Thanks.

  33. Bestpart

    Question…do the black lesbians also blame black men for their homosexuality?

  34. blackgirlinberlin on said:

    Its true.. I have been approached many times by white women trying to sleep with me. They think they can control us all.. and we all must be attracted to them.

  35. Ms. J on said:

    Sorry about that, DOAN. Maybe you could write a second post going into White feminism.

    But I think we’re going back in time with race relations, so Black males and females absolutely NEED to come together. The well-being of our people depends on this. Our survival depends on this.

  36. Bestpartofwakingup on said:

    Negress, what happened with that one friend was that we were coming back from a graduation of her cousin. Her cousin’s mom is very feminine and married to a woman. Now, while at this graduation, me just being there as the friend, I’m wearing jeans, a polo and some white gyms. The two lesbians clowned me so bad, said I was dressed country and looked like trash(my own friend was the starter.) the two lesbians were dressed like women trying to dress like men(way too hard) and I took it all in stride thinking I don’t want to turn this into a “you hate men” argument in front of her family.

    The male character lesbian said she was going to dress better than she did because she heard that the dad(ex-husband and dad of the cousin graduating) was going to be there and she was going to out dress and this out perform the dad but she decided against it. I hadn’t been this close I to the world of lesbians and how they think and discuss things so it was all too interesting, funny and just crazy for me.

    Anyway, upon driving home, my friend was telling me that she doesn’t like that her cousin is dating this guy and all she can think about is how he’d try to manipulate her and make her his sex toy. I said, if she doesn’t want to have sex the. She does t have to. I had been hearing all the time like sex is t enjoyable for women and they only do it to keep men around. I felt like if you don’t want sex, don’t do me any favors, I’ll be with someone who wants it just as much as I do.

    This is where it got argumentative. My friend began to tell me how I don’t know what it’s like for a woman and how a man wants sex all the time and women don’t and so therefore women have sex with men when they don’t want to.
    I again said dont do me any favors, if you don’t want to have sex, then don’t. Then she said that I still don’t get it and that men have persecuted women for centuries. I told her not black men. Since being brought into this country black men a d women were both destroyed and have been kept down so when you say men, it’s not black men. She proceeded to tell me how wrong I was. I informed her that how would she even know because the one time she was married, she married a white man so she never even gave brothers as chance and now she’s dating a white woman as majority of her women have been white. The white woman that she’s dating is a first time lesbian who dated black men and is done with men and now chooses to date a black woman who looks and acts like a black man.

    Negress and all others, sorry if this is long and had to follow, my thoughts are bursting out and I’m trying to keep up ha ha.

    So to answer the question, I think she has a problem with the male influence and role I this society and she mos def has a gender preference when it comes to treatment, as in women will get her undivided attention and men can go eat a dick, ironically.

    She’s not a long time friend but living in a very white neighborhood out in AZ we found each other and became close due to the similarities in our struggles being black in a red state and white area. She’s from Detroit and ex military and much older than me but since I’ve got older siblings, she was like an older sibling as well. So as we learned about each other I found out that she can’t see herself being with black men and she just loves white women. And because she’s a woman, she gets a pass and can say and do whatever she wants but at the end of the day she’s black and portrays the characteristics of a man.

  37. Bestpartofwakingup on said:

    Ms. J.

    My last relationship was with a white woman. Living in the area that I live in now, I’m invisible to white people, especially women. So I said, screw it, I’m no longer dating white women. Sure enough as soon as I say that this white woman from a more tolerant side of town found me on a dating site. She was cute and it had been a long time since I had been in a relationship and the sistas just weren’t trying to talk to me.

    So I said ok maybe I was a bit hasty and decided to date her. Bad idea. Right around the time of me dating her, I was waking up and becoming self aware. This was bad for us because the reason why she liked black men(thus liking me) had nothing to do with identifying with black anything, experience, lifestyle, culture, struggle…anything. She only liked black men because of the big lips and big noses…kid you not, those were the features she found attractive and black men had them.

    So just reading these responses and posting about my lesbian friend without even knowing about the stats of lesbian irr; it just seems like this post is just firing on all cylinders.

    So thanks again Negress for this post.

  38. Ms. J on said:

    @ Bestpartofwakingup

    Thanks for sharing your experience. It’s just another important reminder because I believe she’s helping to drive a wedge between Black men and women.
    And Zimmerman was just acquitted by an predominantly White jury made up of just women.

    As DOAN said, White feminism and patriarchy is the ROOT of our gender problem. Not other Blacks.

  39. As long as we continue to deny our Creator Yah – black men and black women will war with one another. The white supremacists know this and they continue provide weapons to prolong the war. When we return to Yah, Yah will return to us, and the war will cease. The black man and black woman will be reunited with their Creator to live with one another in eternal peace and joy. White supremacists and white supremacy will no longer exist.

  40. mstoogood4yall on said:

    I think the gender war thing is dumb as fk. George got off as we expected, so what sense does it make to be mad at each other? it doesn’t. WE better wake up to who the enemy is because it dam sure isn’t each other. How many more tragedies do we have to see before we come together and cut the bs. How many have to get killed before we get that we need each other and that we need to come together to defeat this white supremacist society. black women can’t do it by ourselves, we need black men next to us on our side. so at this point idc i’m willing to accept blame for whatever, if it will make us come together and protect our kids and communities. Everything right now for me doesn’t matter the gender war, the skin issue, the black enough issue, idgaf, I just want us to be safe and happy. I want the black boys and girls to be safe and not get killed by each other or by others and receive no justice. Trayvon and emmit were taken from us too soon and will not experience life to the fullest. THat is not our fault, the verdict was not our fault, them getting killed is not our fault. But it is our fault if we don’t do everything we can to prepare the next generation and this generation for what is coming. It is our fault if we allow ourselves to attack each other while ignoring the noose tightening around all of us.

  41. We are not each others enemy and the zimmerman verdict proves

  42. I agree. The one “good” thing about the verdict is that it will force more and more of us to wake up to the truth that we as black people are our only true and reliable resource, it helps to dispel the “post-racial” nonsense whites spout since Obama was elected.

  43. @Negress

    This is a great post. I agree. As a Black woman, I don’t get along much with Black men. Much of it can be blamed on White supremacy and others can be blamed on our self hate. Many of us hate ourselves and side with Whites before we ever unite with our own.

    I wish I could get along with my people because I love my people yet we never want to stick together.

  44. Fire Keys on said:

    I haven’t been able to look at any of the above links, but this thread may get too long (again) before I can respond! It’s interesting that DOAN cited ‘The Colour Purple’ as an example of what has been done to BW, because recently I was listening to the Irritated Genie, and he spoke about how in that movie, all crimes that the white male has ever perpetrated against women were ‘transferred’ to black men…

    Another thing I have noticed in this post is how everyone is talking about White females, and their feminism. What about the other post (about porn), where feminism was being called an invention of the white male?

  45. Umoja on said:

    I don’t get it, but I do…. Why was my confrontation to Verbs considered “gender wars” which spurred this posting ?
    It WASN’T GENDER WARS or some angry Black woman who hates Black men…or “in each others face” who confronted Verbs. It’s appalling and insulting to simplify and degrade my confrontation of his complete and utter dierrhetic vile towards the whole Black populous as “gender wars”. smh. He totally deflected from the subject matter, ( the T.M. case) and insisted that Blacks need to get their shyt together and stfu in a nut-shell, while consistently referring to Blacks as savages, reprobates, beast and the like, which is the consistent theme of his blog by the way.

    If I were a male who confronted him would it have been deemed, “gender wars”….NO! But let a Black female speak and confront such vile against the whole populous, its….. whoa!!!… gender wars, creating disunity and the like….time to write a post about it.( Sorry Negress)…don’t throw stones at class houses….he’s right…blah, blah, blah. Yet, when he spoke such blatant vile venom against the WHOLE populous and totally deflected from the thread…..crickets, but as soon as I confronted him, many came out of the woodwork and deemed it ….gender wars. smh These are the voices and behaviors of the abused .

    As I’ve stated before; Blacks in general are addicted and have been programmed to accept abuse to the point that abuse is CONDONED, SUPPORTED, ENABLED and most of all…. many DO NOT recognize abuse. Black folk have become our worst oppressors and abusers. Programmed to forgive any and all atrocities and forgive, forgive and forgive some more….and do be patient and understanding no matter what the circumstances, even in hell.
    Sorry people, I DO NOT consider every Black person as “brother” or “sister” just because they’re Black, nor will I be patient and understanding to complete and utter contempt, vile and venom to our own race of people, nor will I chock it up as a result of white supremacy….not always. If a Black man raped me; I’m not going to say, ” well that’s white supremacy for ‘ya, whites took away his manhood”….or beats the crap outta’ me and chock it up as a result of white supremacy. Extremes don’t get a pass, male or female, as in the case of Verbs diarrhetic venom…….IDENTICAL to white supremacist and MK Ultra human cyborgs hired for this current agenda. It’s no wonder that Tommy S. remains…..Blacks support and condones his vile. But let’s be patient, it’s just a result of white supremacy and it has to be said. While Black women are consistently referred to as savages, beasties, bitches, whores, ect… smh No, I’m not a feminist.

    Something has gone terrible wrong when vile and utter contempt has become equated to “helping”, something “good” or better yet… “it had to be said”. It’s abuse. Period; which the majority of Blacks are conditioned to, c0-sign; therefore enable.

  46. Umoja

    “I don’t get it, but I do…. Why was my confrontation to Verbs considered “gender wars” which spurred this posting ?”

    It was not your confrontation that spark this posting specifically. This topic, our anger at each other, keeps coming up, even when the conversation has naught to do with black male-black female relations.

    It comes up constantly because we have issues with ourselves and with each other. I wrote this post as a way to put this issue, which has everyone in turmoil, to bed once and for all. I wrote this post as a way to explain WHY we’re so angry, where the anger comes from and how to fix it.

    The answer: It all starts with our individual selves and accepting responsibility for our own actions.

  47. THE ALCHEMIST on said:

    @DOAN

    Your article quotes black males and allows them to tell you why they hate black women. The reasons given are the standard drivel about black women being brainwashed emasculating feminist that have forced black men to hate them. Then you quote another black man who basically says that black women are just jealous of BM exercising their god given right to lust after the daughters of their enemies.

    You privileged the voices of black males and allowed them to tell you a black women all about black women. Black males see black women through a pair of lenses coated with a thick layer of cultural bias. Their vision of black women is therefore very distorted. If you read Eldridge Cleaver’s book “Soul on Ice” in the “Allegory of the Black Eunuch” and “The Primeval Mitosis”s chapters he likens black women to amazons and calls white women ultrafeminines. This book was written in the early 1960s when hardly any black women were in feminist organization. He could not have been emasculated by big mannish amazon black feminists. There really weren’t any around back then. This construction of black womanhood by black males dates back to before the modern feminist movement. Their view of black women is distorted by their on internalized view of white women as ultrafeminine goddesses. They have an idealized mythical view of white womanhood as the standard by which all women should be measured. In their eyes black women will always be emasculating she-males. In our society dark skin codes as masculine and lighter skin codes as feminine. Any woman that isn’t white, “high yella” or a “red bone” is masculine in the consciousness of black males. They have a well documented fetish for all things light and bright. They have callouses on their knees from worshiping at the altar of white femininity. They feel cheated and “gyped” to have been stuck/paired up with woman that do not look like their vision of high status valuable women. Black males constantly compare black women to non-black women and feel slighted; this is the source of much of their anger and hatred. Much of their hatred of black women rests on our blackness. Notice they are not rushing to marry African women that do not have our “bad attitudes”.

    The complaining about bad attitudes, weaves, and masculine behavior are excuses to justify being prostrate at the altar of white femininity. Until their idealization of white women is addressed any brown skinned black woman that has a job and an opinion will be labeled an emasculating she-male feminist. I’ve noticed a trend on the internet of black males referencing black women and girls as apes, monkeys and gorillas. I initially assumed that this was the work of white trolls. I now know that many of these people are indeed black males.

  48. Negress,

    “SORRY SEEMS TO BE THE HARDEST WORD”

    You’ve created a tiny space for us to feel safe, to vent our anger and frustration, to feel love and to express love, but we are never going to resolve our problems or accomplish anything positive unless we learn to accept and recognized the role(s) we all play in our own misfortunes and setbacks…I think one of the toughest obstacle that we need to conquer is our pride, if we want to get back to loving our black people, and ultimately ourselves, we first need to recognize when we say hurtful thing to them and apologize( without any reservation or beating around the bush).

    Negress, Thank you for caring about us…

  49. Umoja on said:

    @ Negress
    “……. even when the conversation has naught to do with black male-black female relations. …”
    Exactly my point. My confrontation toward him was deemed, “gender wars” by many. If I were a male, my confrontation would not have been deemed or mis-interpreted as “gender wars” at all. Period. The thought of gender wars would not have been entertained if I were a male; and no I am not a feminist. It’s just insulting that when a Black woman speaks it is deemed, gender wars, an angry Black woman, a feminist, a bitter Black woman, angry at Black men ….just to name a few. I would have confronted a female just the same who clearly and intentionally spews forth contemptible venom towards our race of people throughout and consistently via the internet and his blog. It is poisonous, co-inspires white supremacy and I’ll never have patience for it or be silent about it. Everyone Black is not a brotha’ or sistha’, yet those who would get us all killed given the chance. But I will remain silent when ever someone Black or white speaks such blatant and intentional venom towards our race of people here, now that I know it will be deemed “gender wars”, misinterpreted or not.
    I bid you peace

  50. mstoogood4yall on said:

    The gender war is dumb. Black men and black women have done some dumb sheit. A black man came to george zimmerman’s defense as his token black friend, and we saw a black woman was the intern for george zimmerman’s defense team. WE have some cooning black ppl that are causing alot of this foolishness. The black men that go after redbones, and white women, are imo purging themselves from the community. Not all of us who are black share the same goals and ideas, the ones that don’t need to go any dam way.

    1 corinthians 5:13 God will judge those outside. “Expel the wicked person from among you.

  51. THE ALCHEMIST on said:

    How does the fact the most black men and black women that are murdered are killed by black men fit into this narrative?

  52. Jay in the Black Dimension on said:

    Of all the people who post on this blog, you are the most negative. You contribute mostly onesided stereotypes of Black men and finger pointing. Your disdain for Black men is evident. You never offer any solutions, and I’ve never seen you write anything that would lead one to believe that you are dedicated to the rise of the Black collective. I’m starting to wonder if you are white (or involved with a white mate).

  53. Mariama on said:

    @ The Alchemist:

    Thank you for this very honest critique. Colorism is the 800lb gorilla in the room that black folks are in complete denial about. Too many, I mean too many black men will pass a beautiful black colored woman to chase a white woman just to say that he has one. I have seen this countless times. Look at the countless black men in the media; ie: sports, movies, music. Most of them seem to take great pleasure in affirming every woman’s beauty but black women. Most black women are very aware of this even if they don’t vocalize it. What does this say to average black woman? It says alot. I would assume that most black women are very angry about this and react in different ways. I am not making excuses, but just try to understand. Listen to your rapper, actor,etc and he will gladly make it clear what color preference he has. This in turn greatly damages the self-esteem of the collective black female. Sorry for the long post, but this colorism issue has caused alot of anger, resentment, hurt and feelings of rejection. It is completely Taboo and wish more people would talk about it to address the deep-seated pain this has caused.

  54. Tyrone on said:

    @The Alchemist

    Blackwomen are not the problem, they’re the only true victim in the inhumanity that we call “The Transatlantic Slave Trade.” Any blackman that runs away from this ugly truth has no business being in our race. In my psyche, there is no “Black Male Patriarchal” crap swirling around in my head. I don’t care how jacked up a blackwoman may be, that doesn’t give me an excuse to be lesser. A million and one arguments i’ve had with other blackmen over the years about this, and it still doesn’t fly with me. If a sista is forsaking herself, she knows that. As we know, physical and verbal abuse, molestation, rape, and colorism are forced on our sistas…It’s Not Their Fault! I sat back and observed the evil of some blackmen towards blackwomen. I didn’t see any backup for sistas from politicians, preachers, etc. Excuse after endless excuse, year after year. I realized that some blackmen are just evil as hell, which allowed me to see the truth in living color. Man is imperfect, Man will always fall short. Brothas, stop believing that G-O-D is a male. As long as we believe in this sexist bs, blackwomen will not be given the love and respect they deserve from blackmen and humanity as a whole. Who gave you life? Who loves you more than life itself? Who do you cry to when your life is hanging in the balance? Alchemist, Thank You for being a defender and champion of black womanhood. You make your mother proud to have birthed you.

    Ty

  55. Tyrone on said:

    @Umoja

    Sista, please understand that coonish blackmen and jealous whitewomen are one in the same…Haters! White females push their hatred of blackwomen thru the ignorance of self-loathing blackmen and their mixed daughters. Connect the dots sistren. Hatred of blackwomen is the game that is being played, let’s not kid ourselves. Negress is being overly kind to blackmen on this issue. I love Negress, but, patience is not a virtue right now. Gender Attack is the correct term, not Gender War. 3 vs. 1 is an attack…Please Believe!

    Ty

  56. The gender wars against Black men and Black women in the West are a side effect of White supremacy. Many of us are fighting among each other because we want White approval and acceptance in this racist society. So many Blacks throw each other under the bus just for Whites to like and accept them. Also feminism, non Black women and media consumption plays a role in this as well.

    Feminism plays a role in this too because when Black women joined the feminism movement in the 1960s/1970s, it deeply affected the Black family structure for good. Black women had no business joining feminism since it was for White women who wanted gender and economic equality to their White male counterparts. It was never for Black women. It was Black women’s biggest mistake in joining feminism.

    Also the media consumption plays a role in this too. The media portrays Black women in the vilest and ugliest ways. And many men even Black American men fall for these bad stereotyping of Black women. The media’s portrayal of Black women being ugly, loud, ghetto etc leads many people to think all Black women are like that and many men stay away from Black women for that reason. And young Black boys who watch TV absorb these stereotypes about Black women and choose not to date them based on what they have seen on TV.

    Where do non Black women come in?

    Well light skin, mixed Black women and non Black women especially White women benefit from being above Black women in the world of dating. Unlike Black women in AmeriKlan, they have many choices in who they can mate with and partner with. And many times, these women think that they are above and better than Black women because they benefit from the privileges of having lighter skin and fitting the beauty standards in AmeriKlan. And because many Black men, who have been brainwashed by the media, go and date these women and put down Black women because of their self hate and inferiority complex. Thus many Black men in the West bash Black women and say that mixed, light skin and non Black women are better than Black women just because non Black women have lighter skin and fit the beauty standards of AmeriKlan.

  57. Hi DOAN,,

    I remember these post and for a while I had to stop posting. I have learned a lot about these issues since then and sad to say that I now see that the great majority of us black women will live our lives without mates. I no longer look at black women who marry out and wonder why. I know why and I think this trend will continue as the war against us picks up steam and rages on.

    Please correct me if, I an wrong, but is the onus for fixing this really placed solely on black women, the comments about fixing ourselves and yet that is never enough and not expecting anything in return and even the men here talking about mixed women being the best of both worlds. Yet, we are condemned if, we do and mocked if, we don’t.

    We black women have the lowest marrying out rate not because we are unwanted, but because we love ours so much we will wait and be desperate for our own, but what happens when our own makes it clear we are not wanted and will never be wanted. We can withstand the forces of who would try to make us bend except that of the black man.

    I see it now as sisters are moving on out here and are starting to bend, because for some a life alone is not one every woman can bare. Yet, if, we fail, if, it falls we women will be blamed. I see that now and have finally made my peace with it and have moved on to fill my life with self love and have stopped waiting, looking, hoping and longing for the black man collective to love us and protect us. Malcolm was right black women are the most unprotected and abused women in the world. It is so freeing to do so as we were never meant to carry the sword I put it down men will have to pick it up.

    It is so wonderful to be a black woman without this burden no more fighting.

  58. Hi Honeytreebee

    I’m happy to see you!

    Words cannot express how sad I am to still get letters of this nature. I had this conversation yesterday with a black female and how it’s affected her entire life.

    Until we begin to love and respect ourselves as one collective race, this disconnect will never end. Something I’ve always said to black men who bash us is ,” The fruit is never superior to the tree from which is came.”

    I understand your decision and hope you are at peace.

  59. Courtney H. on said:

    This video is an example of the BM/BW “gender war.” It’s by a Black man who obviously hates Black women:

    This video is by a Black man who explains how, because of slavery, that this “war” got started.

  60. I agree with some things in this article. I have also done a good amount of research not only on black history but Black women’s history around the world. Our societies were originally matriarchal (the entire world was originally matriarchal) so I can’t, don’t and won’t agree with Black men being the head/lead of anything. [We – Black women – fought wars when necessary, were of our highest spiritually, built civilizations and passed on knowledge: mathematics, science, architecture, spirituality, Nature, etc.] Not only do I disagree because they have been the head and have failed horrible, but also because they were not originally the head and that explains why they have failed horribly. Also, if you look more into HERstory (not HIStory) you will find that Black men are the ones who sold Black women out to other races for trinkets and other illusionary gifts offered to them (they did this in America in as well). Because of this, we as Black people are in this condition. It pretty much happened the same way everywhere. The restoration of our race as a whole is in the Black woman and begins with the Black woman. If we do not wake up, if we do not begin demanding/making things change and if we continue to view them as the head of anything, we will continue to suffer as we have been doing. I am on the path to restoring my bloodline because I know it can only be done through women (no other male in my family nor anyone else I know nor have observed is on this path).

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